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Greetings, gentlemen.
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I assume your wives are not with you,
as the very title of our piece...
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...is sufficient to strike terror
in their hearts...
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...and cause them to remain at home
in their kitchens, where they belong!
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In any case, gentlemen,
you have come here tonight to learn...
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...and so you shall.
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We will begin by considering
the case of Mr. Stanley Ford.
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