Movie Quotes for Home Alone 1

Police Officer #1: Freeze!
Earl Unger: [in the pool frozen] You gotta be kidding me.

Streetwalker #1: [to Kevin] Hey, lookin for someone to read you a
  bedtime story? Ha ha ha ha.

Gangster Johnny on TV: Maybe Im off my hinges, but I believe you.
  Thats why Im gonna let you go. Im gonna give you to the count of
  three to get your lousy, lyin, low-down, four flushing carcass OUT
  my door! 1... 2... [Fires Tommy gun, killing girl gangster] 3.
  Merry Christmas, you filthy animal. [fires again] And a Happy New
  Year. [Fires again]

Gangster Johnny: [hears knock at door] Who is it?
Gangster Snakes: [Snakes comes in] Its me, Snakes. I got the
  stuff.
Gangster Johnny: Leave it on the doorstep and get the hell outta
  here.
Gangster Snakes: All right, Johnny, but what about my money?
Gangster Johnny: What money?
Gangster Snakes: Acey said you had some dough for me.
Gangster Johnny: That a fact? How much do I owe ya?
Gangster Snakes: Acey said 10%.
Gangster Johnny: [smirks] Too bad Acey aint in charge no more.
Gangster Snakes: What do you mean?
Gangster Johnny: Hes upstairs taking a bath. Hell call you when
  he gets out.
Gangster Johnny: Hey, I tell ya what Im gonna give *you*, Snakes.
Gangster Johnny: [pulls out machine gun]
Gangster Johnny: Im gonna give you to the count of 10, to get your
  lying, yellow, no-good keister off my property, before
[shouts]
Gangster Johnny: I pump your guts full of lead!
Gangster Snakes: [wide eyed and calm] All right, Johnny, Im sorry.
  Im goin!
Gangster Johnny: 1... 2... 10!
Gangster Johnny: [starts unloading bullets into Snakes while
  laughing maniacally]
Gangster Johnny: Keep the change ya filthy animal!

Gangster Johnny: Who is it?
Pizza Boy: Its Little Nero, sir. I have your pizza.
Gangster Johnny: Leave it at the doorstep and get the hell outta
  here.
Pizza Boy: Okay, but what about the money?
Gangster Johnny: What money?
Pizza Boy: Well, youll have to pay for your pizza, sir.
Gangster Johnny: How much do I owe you?
Pizza Boy: Thatll be $11.80, sir.
[Kevin drops the money from the door hatch]
Gangster Johnny: Keep the change, you filthy animal.
Pizza Boy: Cheapskate.
Gangster Johnny: Hey, Im going to give you to the count of ten, to
  get your ugly face out of my property, before I pump your guts full
  of lead! 1, 2, 10!

Megan McCallister: [lines up her families near the airport van] 1,
  2...
Buzz McCallister: [rudely interrupting] 11, 92, 12...
Megan McCallister: Buzz, dont be a moron.

Roy Chubby Brown: A pal of mine does that all the time, you know he
  always goes to the cinema - cause its half price you see - hes
  unemployed so he gets in for half price. But the thing is, you
  know, when I bump into him, he talks in fucking riddles. I bumped
  into him in ASDA the other morning, and this is how the
  conversation went; He said: "Hey Chubbs, you know Once Upon a Time
  in America MY Cousin Vinny was Home Alone, Rocky was Home Alone 2.
  This is The Greatest Story Ever Told. This is a Love Story about An
  Innocent Man. When Harry Met Sally in Philadelphia it was a Fatal
  Attraction, cause she was a Pretty Woman with E.T.".
Roy Chubby Brown: I said "E.T.?"
Roy Chubby Brown: He said "Extra Tit. She was a Single White Female
  with a Death Wish. She Deceived Alfie The Jazz Singer with her
  Dirty Dancing and Indecent Proposal. She gave Personal Services to
  A Few Good Men - Batman, Rain Man, City Slickers, she was no Fish
  Called Wanda, she was no Jewel in the Crown, but she fucked like a
  Roger Rabbit. On Friday the 13th her Bodyguard, Last of the
  Mohicans caused Cape Fear with his War of the Roses. He informed
  The Godfather, Scarface - like Gorillas in the Mist, they were
  looking for Revenge. You see Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves was Down
  and Out in Beverly Hills too, took Planes, Trains & Automobiles to
  Manhattan On the Waterfront. They met, On Golden Pond, Lethal
  Weapon 1, 2 and 3. But a miracle happened on 42nd Street - Yentl
  was on Schindlers List, was Entertaining Mr. Sloane, the Robocop,
  went A Bridge too Far, told Forrest Gump, the Accidental Hero. He
  said Tootsie, Tootsie, Tootsie, dont Look Back in Anger, look Back
  to the Future. Youre Twins, youre Next of Kin, you were Switched
  at Birth. Just Throw Momma from the Train. She was determined This
  Shouldnt Happen to a Vet. Your daddy two shoes Uncle Buck took A
  Passage to India, to The Land that Time Forgot, Beyond the Stars,
  to be like Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs and live happily ever
  after!"

[intro to the Fat video]
Fat Man: Yo, home boy, whereya been, man? Weve been looking for
  you.
Fat Man 2: Yeah. We aint seen you around Burger World lately! So
  whereya been?
Al: Oh, you know, around.
Fat Man 1: Want a piece of pizza? Think I got an extra piece around
  here somewhere...
Al: No, thats okay, really.
Fat Man 2: Yo, Ding-Dong. Ding-Dong, man. Ding-Dong, yo!
Al: No, thanks, really.
Fat Man 3: [shoving a burger in Als face] Yo, eat this, man. Its
  good for you.
Al: Im... not really very hungry right now...
Fat Man 1: Hey, man, what it is with you? You on some kind of diet?
Fat Man 2: Yeah! Is that what they teach you in that little sissy
  school of yours?
Al: Back off me, man, back off!
Fat Man 1: The question is, are you fat, or what?
Al: Just leave me alone!
Fat Man 1: I said are you fat?
Al: Get off me, man! Stop it!
Fat Man 1: You aint down with us no more! You aint fat! You aint
  fat!
Al: You aint fat! You aint nothin! YOU AINT NOTHIN!

Stewie Griffin: She packed my bags. Last night preflight. Zero hour
  9am [inhales cigarette] and Im gonna be... high... as a kite by
  then. [transparent Stewie clone #1] And I think its gonna be a long
  time til touch down brings me round again to find, Im not the man
  they think I am at home, Oh No no! Im a rocket man. Rocket man!
  Burnin out his fuse out here, Alone! [Transparent stewie clone #2
  bow tie undone] And I think its gonna be a long time til touch down
  brings me down again to find, Im not the man they think I am at
  home, Oh no no no! Im a rock it man. Rocket man! burnin out his
  fuse out here. Alone!

[Opening narration, season 1]
Commander Jeffrey David Sinclair: It was the dawn of the third age of
  mankind, ten years after the Earth-Minbari War. The Babylon Project
  was a dream given form. Its goal: to prevent another war by
  creating a place where humans and aliens could work out their
  differences peacefully. Its a port of call, home away from home
  for diplomats, hustlers, entrepreneurs, and wanderers. Humans and
  aliens wrapped in two million, five hundred thousand tons of
  spinning metal, all alone in the night. It can be a dangerous
  place, but its our last, best hope for peace. This is the story of
  the last of the Babylon stations. The year is 2258. The name of the
  place is Babylon 5.

[last lines of Episode 1.9]
Dave Blassingame: What are you going to do?
Carlotta: The village is our home, senor. We will wait here.
Dave Blassingame: Alone?
Carlotta: For a while. But someday a man will come, lonely and
  tired... and he will stay. A man who can work. And after him,
  another. We will wait for our one man. They will come back.
Dave Blassingame: Yeah, I guess they will. Adios.
Carlotta: Adios.